The Bloke’s Guide to Valentine’s Day

Pop Culture, Spultured


Well, it’s that time of year again and you’re thinking, “What the hell does this Valentine’s Day shit”mean? To be honest – no one really knows. Yet, of course, the retail chains L-O-V-E to take advantage of this non-holiday event.

But more importantly, you’re thinking, does my girl even care? Coming from a tomboy like myself, yes, oh God, she definitely does.

So here are some tips.

She will tell you that she doesn’t care.
Earth-to-man, she really does dig this day, and she’s just saying that so she doesn’t look selfish.

Just buy something.
If she’s not too materialistic, she won’t care if it’s just a photo frame with you in it. Girls aren’t as complex as you think.

Tell her she’s beautiful.
This is something guys struggle to do, and it’s gentlemen like – think brownie points. Plus, it’s better than calling her sex-muffin.

If you’re single, get out of the friend-zone.
This is the time, don’t be a pussy; what’s the worst she could do? I mean, she could say no, but at least you can crawl back into that friend-zone you just tried to escape.

Look and smell nice.
If you’re a tradie, make the extra effort to go home and trade in the fluoro for a nice button-up shirt with a squirt of cologne, that way when you’re running late, she can forgive you because you look better than usual.

Don’t be cliché.
The worst thing you can do to a girl is freak her out, so if you’re thinking of popping the question with a bottle of champagne to a girl you’ve known for ten-minutes, just don’t.

Remind her of an event.
Something very extreme for guys to do, but just think how nice it would be to go down to the beach where you guys had your first date, or whatever.

Don’t freak out.
Just show your affection more on this day than ever. That way she can brag to everyone and all-that-jazz.

Nervous? Yeah, good.
This shows you actually care about this girl. And if you do love her, just be yourself and do something nice. I generally report motorsport for Spultured, so don’t question my theories… they will work.

I am still female and I can be your cupid on Twitter if you follow @LorenHazelwood.

#ValentinesDayIsOverrated #LoveSpultured Follow us on Twitter: @spultured


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